


Are you satisfied?

by wildcat_88



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Sex, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, Confusion, Dry Humping, Enemies to Lovers, Explicit Language, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Hate to Love, Horny Teenagers, Masturbation, Mutual Pining, Oral Sex, POV Alternating, Rough Kissing, Rough Sex, Teen Angst, Teen Romance, Teenagers, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Underage Drinking, Underage Kissing, Vaginal Fingering, Virgin Ben Solo, Virgin Rey, childhood enemies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-22
Updated: 2018-11-25
Packaged: 2019-06-14 09:26:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 4
Words: 14,861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15385764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wildcat_88/pseuds/wildcat_88
Summary: Ben Solo and Rey Kenobi have been at each other's throats since they were five years old.It doesn't help that Ben is forced to spend time at Rey's house every day after school due to her mom agreeing to take care of him until his parents were done working.As much as they hate each other, they soon come to realize things aren't always what they seem...





	1. Is it bad?

**Author's Note:**

> This is going to be a quick little story because I can't get enough of writing Ben and Rey as children and making them grow up.  
> Plus I'm all about that enemies to lovers scenario. 
> 
> Anyways I just want to say if you don't like my story that's fine, but I will delete hate comments <3
> 
> Much love to all my amazing readers who have helped me get past people not saying very nice things to me. Your kind comments really inspired me to keep writing even though I was feeling disheartened. 
> 
> So, thank you and just know you all mean the freaking world to me. I'd be nothing without you all <3
> 
> XOXO

Rey

I was only five years old when I met Ben Solo.

It was his mass of black curls that framed his face like a dark halo that I noticed first. It accentuated his pale skin and even darker eyes. He had a nose that looked too big for his features, pink lips that were formed in a scowl, and ears that stuck out just a little bit too much. He was much too tall in my opinion for his age. Gangly limbs that didn't seem to know what to do with themselves and features that were just too out of the ordinary to be considered handsome.

I can remember standing awkwardly next to my mom as she beamed down at me from time to time with those perfect teeth of hers shining at me. Her eyes were that warm blue that rivaled the sun's warmth. Her hand was gentle on my shoulder as she rattled on to the man standing before her and next to him the boy that made me have to stifle down a giggle. It was to my dismay when I learned that I would be spending time with Ben Solo every day after school whether I liked it or not.

His dad and mom both worked long hours causing them to have issues being able to pick Ben up from school. That's where my parents came into play. My mom was a stay-at-home mom and my dad was always home by five. This is why they agreed to help out the Solo's with their son. When his dark eyes landed on me his scowl deepened further. From that day on I knew that he and I would never get along.

* * *

 

Age Eight

"I said give it back!" I screeched at the top of my lungs as I chased Ben down the street. My legs were no match for his long ones that made him the fastest runner at our school.

He was holding my favorite doll captive, his fingers grimy from playing in the dirt marring her porcelain skin. I can hear the roar of his laugh as he runs faster, but it causes him to trip a little. He has to right himself giving me just enough time to catch up. I pounce on his back reaching for the doll that he is holding above his head. His stupidly long arms keeping my doll from my reach. He grunts holding my weight on his back until he shrugs me off causing me to land on the grass.

He's laughing so hard tears are at his eyes. His black shirt is loose on him, his body so thin it reminds me of a skeleton. Black jeans sit on his waist hanging on by a belt and his converse are a bloody mess with dirt caked on them. Ebony locks are tousled, some strands curved around his jaw while others stood out like he put a knife in a socket. His smile is crooked as he stares at me disdain clear in his dark eyes.

"Give it back," I say through clenched teeth.

"Why should I? This is too much fun," he retorts throwing my doll up. I gasp when she falls to the ground and shatters. That seems to surprise him just as much as me. He stares at the broken pieces, ebony eyes dart to mine.

I'm seething when I stand to my feet. I'm unable to control myself, running at him I begin to rain punches down upon him. He howls in pain grabbing my wrists. We wind up on the grass rolling around both trying to get the upper hand. My fists keeping punching his ribs, a growl emits from his throat, and I manage to reach up to his hair grasping onto as much as I could. I mercilessly wrenched and yanked his hair so hard that he was snarling like a wild animal.

"You bitch!" He yelled. I had never heard that word before growing confused as to what it meant. "Let go of my hair!" He hollered trying to unlatch my fingers from his locks. It only sufficed for me to yank harder.

"Oh no! What are you two doing!?" My mom screeched running over, grabbing me by the waist she began to pry my fingers off of Ben's hair. "Let go, Rey!"

She managed to get me off of him, in my fingers was a good chunk of his hair. He was crying miserably. Dirt stained his face, his lip was bleeding too as it quivered. He stood up to his full height shielding his tears with his hair.

"You are in so much trouble, Rey!" My mom bellowed. I cowered in fear.

"He broke my doll," I mumbled fiddling with my fingers avoiding her blue eyes.

"That does not give you any right to hit him! He's _bleeding_! Go to the house, **_NOW_**."

She turned to Ben and I heard her mumble an apology to him coaxing him to come with her to get cleaned up. When I was inside I went straight to my room slamming my door behind me.

He was such a jerk! My mom always took his side. I hated her for that! Instantly I felt guilty for thinking such a thought about my mom. Still, I was so tired of having Ben around. I wish he'd just fall off the face of the earth and never return.

Our war began the day we met each other. He wasn't fond of sharing his toys, that made me upset, and I threw a tantrum. We ended up fighting over the toy, but our parents still didn't get the hint that we shouldn't be around each other. They wrote it off to us just being what kids did. Of course, that was not entirely true. The fact of the matter was that Ben and I hated each other. We couldn't stand to be in the same room for more than a minute. Our time together always ended up in us fighting, but it had never gotten to the point of being physical. Now that I think about it Kylo only tried to stop me. He hadn't thrown any blows. My dad told me that boys weren't supposed to hit girls, but he also told me that girls shouldn't hit boys either.

I refused to apologize to Ben. He had deserved it for breaking my poor doll. Tears formed at my eyes, that doll had been given to me by my Auntie who passed away from breast cancer and that idiot didn't even understand how much it meant to me. My own mother didn't even care.

I _hated_ Ben Solo. I hated him so much.

* * *

 "Did you hear that Ben punched Poe in the face?"

My eyes drifted over to Rose who was staring at me as if I would care.

"No. He's a hothead so it only makes sense," I replied waiting for the teacher to begin class.

"Well, I guess he's suspended and Poe had to go to the hospital because Ben broke his nose."

I wasn't surprised after yesterday I could tell he was ready to burst.

Ben had issues plain and simple. His parents were hardly around so I figured that was what attributed to his reasons for the way he was. He was desperate for attention. It's why he was always so happy to see my mom. I'm pretty sure she wished he was her son. She adored him. It only made me hate him even more.

He was always stealing the limelight when she was around causing her to have no time to see how amazing I was doing in school. She'd rather listen to Ben's day. I hoped that his little suspension would highlight him in a different light.

"I hope Poe will be okay."

"I also heard it was your mom who picked Ben up."

That gets my attention completely, "What?" I say in disbelief not wanting to believe that my mom would do such a thing.

"Yup, that's what I heard."

The tips of my ears burn with anger, my teeth clenching so hard that they are grinding. My hands are balled into fists turning white.

The rest of class is a nightmare as the teacher drones on about whatever subject we're currently on, but I am elsewhere.

The thought of my mom helping that inconsiderate boy out of trouble makes me want to break everything in sight. Of course, she would save her precious Ben Solo. I doubt she would have done the same for me. All I want to do is wring the life out of that boy.

I wish I had never met him.

* * *

 Ben sat on the couch feigning cool and nonchalance as he watched ‘Buffy The Vampire Slayer.' I still couldn't believe my mom let him watch that. She told me that it would be too scary for me. My eyes keep drifting to the television no longer able to focus on the math homework before me. He looks my way, pinning me with a glare.

"Didn't your mommy tell you this is too scary. Don't want you getting nightmares," he sneered crossing his arms over his chest.

Scowling back I stood to my feet walking to the other side of the couch, plopping down beside him. He tensed at my proximity. I ignored him watching the show as if it didn't bother me that Buffy was driving a stake into a vampire's chest.

The blood was what got to me the most. It disgusted me anytime I got hurt and blood appeared. It made me shiver to watch the show imagining if that was me getting impaled in the chest. My mom was right this show was not something I should be watching.

Ben's hot breath was by my ear making me shiver for a different reason, " _Scared_?"

I huffed pushing at his chest to get him away from me, "As if," I muttered unconvincingly.

As the show continued on I found myself getting more queasy. By the time it was over I felt sick to my stomach.

"What a little baby," Ben taunted standing to his obnoxious height for an eight-year-old and stretched one arm over his chest before switching to the other.

I didn't hesitate to push my feet right in the crook of his knee. It made him fall forward slightly. He turned around staring down at me with an expression that screamed _‘Danger! Run!'_

He grabbed my ankle yanking me off the couch my back hit the carpet hard. The air whooshed out of me. There was no smile on his face as he made to leave. Even with the pain in my chest I crawled grabbing onto his pants and yanked. To my horror, they fell down to his ankles. My eyes widened as I stared at the black hair on his surprisingly thick calves and when I looked up I could see his hands were in fists his body trembling. He wore boxers that were loose enough that I could see what was underneath. I shrieked rearing back onto my palms.

He yanked his pants up. "You're a fucking bitch Rey."

He left the house going outside until I presumed my mom returned.

"Fucking bitch," I said out loud, the words felt so dirty in my mouth and I told myself I would never repeat them ever again.

When my mom finally arrived she took Ben back home. Once she returned she let me know that she would be watching over Ben during his suspension. Poe's family didn't end up pressing charges so Ben was getting off scot-free once again.

"Rey, I know you're not very fond of Ben, but you should be a little nicer to him, okay?"

"If he was nicer to me, maybe I'd have a change of heart."

My mom chuckled smoothing hair away from my face. "He's going through a tough time in his life. He feels alone and he's not the best at making friends, but maybe you can be his friend."

I pulled away from her loving touch, "I don't want to be friends with him."

I watched as her eyes went soft around the edges, "Okay sweetie. Go get some sleep."

I whispered goodnight, hurrying into my bedroom.  I didn't ever want to be friends with a guy like Ben Solo even if he was having a hard time. He dug his own grave and it was up to him to get himself out of it not me.

As I sat on my bed the thought of what I did today came creeping into my subconscious and slowly made its way to the forefront of my brain. The thought made me blush instantly. I didn't mean to pull his pants down, it was a total accident that left me scarred with what I saw. There was no way I could even say what I witnessed out loud. Whatever they were, they had been smooth looking and from the way, he reacted to his pants being pulled down I'm sure he never wanted me to see that either.

Trying to force that sight out of my head I laid back, flipping from side to side in an attempt to get comfortable, but the thought wouldn't leave my head. Letting out a sigh of frustration I closed my eyes managing to eventually fall asleep.

* * *

 Kylo

Age 15

She was a brat with a smart little mouth that wouldn't shut up. Even when we were kids she was constantly finding every way to get under my skin. I can still remember when she had the audacity to pull my pants down to my fucking ankles. She probably saw my hairless balls at that angle when I refused to wear boxer briefs and chose boxers because I liked to skate. All the skaters wore boxers and I wanted to fit in. That came back to bite me in the ass that day.

Our relationship didn't get any better from that point on, we still argued every single day, and to this day we're still at each other's neck. The girl grinds my gears. I still don't understand why my parents tell me I have to go to her house after school. I'm old enough to be home alone, but they insist that I need to spend time with the Kenobi's until they get home.

Thankfully, Mrs. Kenobi offered a place for me to store my weights in the garage and Mr. Kenobi told me I was always welcome to use his bench-press if I wanted to. I was in their garage at the moment, lifting the 60-pound weight doing my bicep curls.

With looking like a man at fifteen, it had its benefits and consequences all tied together with a fucking bow. The benefits of looking like a man were that I could pass off as eighteen and watch rated-R flicks without having to produce an ID. I was able to get cigarettes one time at a janky liquor shop where the owner accepted only cash.

The consequences were I was scary as fuck. Nobody my age looked like I did; it's because most boys don't want to put in the effort to gain muscle. All I do is go to school, to the Kenobi's, workout, eat, and go to sleep.

I was around thirteen when I decided that I wanted to give wrestling a shot. The moment they posted the signup sheets at school, my name was one of the first on there. The sport was grueling at first, the regimen I followed was tasking, but all in all, after time went on I was able to perfect the sport.

My body changed that year. I was no longer the skinny tall guy. My body was replaced with hard muscle that made my 6'2 frame even more menacing. Luckily, by being in the sport I was able to make some friends. One even turned out to be the kid I punched in the face in eighth grade. He wasn't too happy to see me again, but once we got to talking we discovered we had way more in common than we thought we did.

My cell phone began ringing in my pocket, setting my weights down I answered it, "Hello?"

"Ben, my man. Tell me you're at home?" Poe asked hope in his tone.

"Nope, I'm where I'm always at around this time- the Kenobi household."

Poe let out a loud over exaggerated sigh, "Well, can Hux and I come to hang for a bit? There's something we want to show you."

"Let me ask Mrs. Kenobi first."

Poe snorted, "Okay, you go ask mommy and I'll be waiting for your text."

"Go fuck yourself. I'll text you," I quipped hanging up as I shoved my phone back into my basketball shorts.

Jogging up the steps to the door I opened it to see that Mrs. Kenobi was busy cooking. I walked up behind her wrapping my arms around her shoulders starling her. She laughed when she realized it was me.

"You're sweaty Ben." She swatted playfully at me.

I turned to lean against the counter. "Would you mind if a couple of my friends stopped by?"

Her blue eyes met mine, "Sure, they can join us for dinner if they'd like."

"Thanks, Lana," I said pressing a kiss to her cheek. She was more like a mom to me than my own and I treated her as such.

I walked to the bathroom, it was shut, and I didn't think twice in opening it. Rey screeched as she wrapped her towel tight around her, tweezers in her hand as she wielded them like a weapon against me. Her wet hair was plastered to her face, her golden shoulders smattered with freckles. I rolled my eyes at her, pushing inside, not giving two shits what she looked like. As if I would ever be attracted to her puny body.

"I need to shower princess." I turned on the water noting it was already warm from her shower. I grabbed the collar of my tank-top yanking it up and over my head setting it on top of the toilet seat cover.

"Are you kidding me, Ben," she hissed, but when my eyes drifted over to her I saw those big hazel orbs wandering over the planes of my chest down to my abs.

"See something you like darling?" A lazy smirk crossed my face as I ran my hand down my muscle-ridden stomach.

Her cheeks were bathed in red, chin held up in defiance as she scurried out of the bathroom slamming the door behind her. The little brat.

I text Poe to let him know he could come over, sending him the address. Jumping in the shower I rid of the sweat that was all over my body. Due to practically living here it was normal for me to shower here. I even left extra clothes, deodorant, body spray, and a toothbrush here for after I was done with working out.

After showering I pulled on blue jeans, a black tank, and went without shoes. My hair would just have to air dry because I wasn't in the mood to fuss with it, plus it was just the guys coming over. Definitely didn't need to impress those two.

The door knocked right when I was walking into the living room. Answering it, Poe and Hux shuffled in both wearing shit-eating grins. My brow arched in confusion as they placed their shoes by the doorway, said hello to Lana, and we filed down into the garage.

I grabbed us a few foldable chairs. We conjoined in a circle. Poe pushed his brown curls out of his face reaching into his backpack, big brown eyes twinkled as he did so. Hux's leg bobbed up and down. He was hiding a smile behind his hand as if he and Poe had the biggest secret inside that bag. Poe handed me a magazine, I stared down at it. A woman in scantily clad clothes stared back, a seductive smile on her face. Opening it, my face blazed with heat when I realized what kind of magazine it was. I slammed it shut handing it back to Poe.

"What the hell guys?? You brought that shit here??" I huffed out, shaking my head.

"C'mon Ben don't be such a prude. These girls are hot as fuck," Poe declared his lecherous eyes scanning over the naughty pictures of naked women. Hux leaned in to get his fill as well, but I wanted no part in that.

Poe tossed another magazine to me. "Here maybe this is more your thing, the girl on the second page looks exactly like Rey," he taunted with a smirk.

Curiosity got the best of me and I opened it to the page he said. Sure enough, the girl was similar looking to Rey. Her body was slender, golden skin, tits that looked natural, and big hazel eyes that portrayed innocence. I rolled my eyes shutting the magazine about to hand it back until a voice behind me made me freeze.

How the hell was she that stealthy that none of us noticed her coming down the stairs? All of us snapped to attention. I peered over my shoulder to see her eyes so wide they were practically touching her hairline.

"What the hell is that?" She scornfully spat.

"Nothing," I lied without a second's hesitation.

Rey walked around to stand in front of me, my eyes followed her. She snatched the magazine from my loose grip. Jumping to my feet I reached out to grab it, but she dodged my attempt. She opened it, her eyes quickly darted over the material in front of her then back to me.

"You're disgusting Ben. You like this kind of stuff?" Her brow quirked in a challenge.

Hux and Poe were making themselves invisible watching our exchange as if they were merely ghosts that we couldn't see.

"Who cares what I like Rey just give it back it isn't mine."

She laughed humorlessly not believing me for one minute, "Whatever you say. You're the one I caught red-handed with this particular magazine."

"You guys should leave," I say to Hux and Poe. They get the hint scurrying off without grabbing the magazine in Rey's hand. Now that we were left alone I stepped closer to her.

"Give it back, Rey," I demanded, my hand reached out so she could give it to me.

Defiance was evident in her gaze, she shook her head slowly from side to side, "I don't think so, Solo."

I charged forward, she hopped over the bench-press dodging me, a low growl erupted from deep in my chest. She giggled as she held it behind her back. If she wanted to play this game I was more than willing to exude my height and mass over her. Stalking over to her she took a couple steps back then side-stepped me, preparing to run up the stairs, and most likely show it to her mom. That thought made me sick to my stomach I caught up to her wrapping my arm around her waist she gasped as I hoisted her off the ground easily holding her with one arm.

She held the magazine up high causing it to be difficult even with my long arms to grab.

"Just give me the damn magazine Rey!"

"No! I'm going to show my mom what you are once and for all!" She hissed flailing her legs trying to kick at me.

She managed to get me right in the balls, "Ah, _fuck_! You damn brat!"

I dropped her. She managed to fall on her feet, unstable as she tried to scramble up the steps, but I clasped around her ankle tugging her to the ground forcing her onto her back. My lower body was between her thighs as I pushed her hands down on the ground pinning her down with my weight.

"Let-The-Fucking-Magazine-Go-Or-You-Will-Regret-it," I snarled each word into her face, spittle landed on her cheek and she winced away from it.

I was highly aware of something warm being pressed against my crotch, but I hadn't noticed it until this point. When I looked down my brain finally caught up with me that she was wearing a dress. The material was bunched at her hips revealing blue cotton panties to my eyes.

My hands tightened around her wrists, something was taking over me causing my breath to quicken. Heat spanned the length of my body burning me from the inside out. _What the fuck?_

I feel Rey jolt beneath me, her face flamed when she too realized the position we were in. My cock was hardening as we continued to stare at one another. Her eyes got big when she felt it pressing into her. Reaching for the magazine was the stupidest thing I could have ever done because it caused me to grind into her and it felt way too fucking good.

Before I can think twice about what I'm doing my fingers sink into the soft skin of her hips grinding myself once again into her eliciting a strange noise from the back of her throat. My large body is hunched over her, my forehead pressed to the concrete right by her head as I continue to thrust against her. The sensation is so amazing that I'm losing myself to it all, my rationality has flown out the window. Rey's whimpering beneath me. She's the last person I thought I'd be doing this with. After all of our fights, all of our bickerings, biting, scratching-this is what it has come down to, me rutting against her like a dog in heat.

Gaining my wits back I make to move off of her until I feel her fingers threading through my hair, pulling my forehead against her. "Keep going," she whispers. Our breaths mingling together lips mere inches apart.

"Fuck," I say on a shaky breath.

My hips begin to roll into her, becoming erratic as I chase this feeling of ecstasy. Both our lips are parted, she's whimpering, and I'm panting as my body starts to feel like it is on fire. Her legs lock around my waist assisting my frantic thrusting.

"B-Ben," she stammers. Her forehead presses into mine harder, her mouth is forming in a circle, and suddenly she's biting down on her lip so hard I'm sure she's drawing blood as she tries to muffle her moans. Her body is quivering and I'm pretty sure I just made her come. The thought only spurs me on, suddenly I'm groaning into the damp skin of her neck. My hips slightly rocking myself through my release.

Reality hits me like a ten-ton brick and I'm pushing up to my feet. My spend making me super uncomfortable, but as I gaze down at Rey I see that her panties are soaked through. My brows furrow at the sight.

"I'm sorry," I whisper and dart up the stairs still unable to process what I just did to innocent little Rey, the girl I was supposed to hate.

I avoided eye contact with Lana who mentioned dinner was ready as I flew past her making my way to the bathroom. Shoving my pants down I cleaned myself off and sat against the tub running my fingers through my hair, tugging hard at the strands.

I had fucked up big time.

* * *

 

 


	2. Is It So True?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey and Kylo are growing up much too fast and things are changing in ways they never thought could be possible...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to say thank you so much to all my readers!  
> You are all so amazing <3  
> I can't even express how much I appreciate your support! I love reading your heartwarming comments. You all truly inspire me, so thank you!!!
> 
> Sorry for short chapter and cliffhanger, but there will be more tomorrow ;)
> 
> Much love <3

Rey

"Do you not know the meaning of a shirt? I deadpan as Ben walks into the living room wearing nothing but sweatpants.

His pools of black flick over to me, but he says nothing as he takes a seat on the couch opposite of me. Our parents have all decided to go on a date night together demanding that we hang out together while they are gone. They said they would feel better knowing that we're together rather than alone at our respective households.

In my opinion, I think they are idiots for leaving us alone in a house together. It's not like anything is going to happen, but still being alone with Ben is making me antsy. After the day in the garage, dinner was not one to remember. It was so uncomfortable and gut-wrenching that I was sure I was going to keel over and die. Ben wouldn't even look at me, playing with his food staring at it like it killed his cat. He politely asked if he could be excused only moments later, making an excuse that he wasn't feeling good and of course my parents bought it.

Since that fateful day we haven't talked much, sometimes we are about to argue, and as we stare at each other humiliation washes over us and we drop the argument like a sack of potatoes.

 It had been a mistake. I figured that's what he wrote it off to as well.

Still, when I picture his face twisted up in pleasure, panting next to my ear with warm breath, full lips hovered above my own-I can't stop the wetness that pools between my legs or the way my body heats to uncomfortable levels. It didn't help how I found out just how vast Ben was. He was a giant not just in height, but body mass too. He had such a firm chest that feeling it against my own only drove up the feeling of needing his weight against me. Ben Solo was no longer the skinny boy I remember. He was replaced with hard muscle that made me want to dig my fingers into all the sharp ridges.

Ben had become a man at fifteen and I didn't know what to do about the way my hormones went haywire every time he was in the same room with me. Ben is exuding a devil-may-cry vibe as he lounges on the couch as we watch ‘Happy Gilmore.' My eyes have a mind of their own as they wander over his smooth sculpted chest, and down to his stomach that clenches when he laughs making his strong abs even more prominent. The thin trail of black hair that leads from his navel and disappears below his waistband makes me gulp. I refuse to look any further in fear of what I'll find.

As I'm still looking he moves his hand to the place I had been avoiding to look at and seems to readjust myself. Flickering my eyes up to his face I see that it's almost as if he doesn't realize he's doing it like it's a normal thing he does all the time and maybe he does. I had caught my dad do the same and had been mortified not understanding why he would do such a thing in my presence. Seeing Ben as he did it made it click that it's probably a guy thing. Finn had told me that sometimes his balls stick to his thigh. I hit upside the head after that comment, my face was beet red. He only snickered and called me a prude.

Ben's dark eyes glance over to see that I'm blatantly staring at him. I've been caught, remaining frozen as he searches my face.

"Stop fucking staring at me," he growls, lips curling in anger.

"I wasn't staring at you." My voice comes out much more unconvincing than I had planned making me sound meek as if I were a frightened mouse.

He scoffs, "I can see you in my peripheral _princess_.”

My face flames with heat, "Then put a stupid shirt on!" Immediately I regret saying that because he has a wolfish grin on his stupid face.

"You've seen me without my shirt on countless times Rey. What makes this any different?" His dark brow arches as he waits for me to answer him.

"Shut up Ben. You're an idiot."

"What are you thinking about in that head of yours?" His smile has widened, eyes knowing that I'm a liar.

"Nothing," I whisper, forcing my eyes back on the television.

"You were soaked," he blatantly states. My head snaps in his direction so fast I feel like a freaking owl.

"What is that supposed to mean?" My voice strained, not wanting to believe what he is implying.

His smile falls replaced by a look I can't explain. His large hand is spread out on his stomach and then slides lower, eyes falling shut.

"You were so fucking wet Rey. Tell me why?" His voice is low and husky. My skin tingles, a thrill running up my spine. He's actually talking about what happened in the garage?! I had totally planned to put that incident behind us, but now the memory of dragging my soaked panties down my legs and seeing my arousal dousing them was so embarrassing. I threw those panties in the trash for a reason.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I say through clenched teeth trying to focus on his face until he dips his hand below the waistband of his sweats pulling my attention straight to-

My body trembles when I see what he has begun to do. His hand moves up and down underneath the material. I'm not that much of a prude to not know what he is doing right now.

"This is what I do as I think about the way you grabbed my hair and told me to keep going. I almost came right then and there," he grunts his hand moving faster. His breath coming out in sharp pants that are making the rise and fall of my chest to quicken. "I didn't even know that could feel so good. We were both fully clothed and there I was just rubbing against you. Never knew it could be like that Rey. Want to do that again."

I'm on my feet before I know it crawling into his lap, his hand leaves his sweats pushing under my shirt to grip my waist. I shiver as I sink down onto his hips with my own. A low groan escapes his throat as he cradles both my hips now. My hips roll slightly against the bulge underneath the thin material of his sweats. I glide my hands up the hard ridges of his abs feeling them tense as I do so, up to his sturdy chest, and finally to his strong jaw that I hold onto in the palms of my hand. His eyes have somehow darkened further, he looks raw and dangerous right now. I want to be scared, but I can't find it in myself to care at the moment.

I'm grinding against him, core clenching as the feeling of last time begins to mount. His fingers sink into my hips urging me to go faster. A sharp moan leaves me, just like last time I press my forehead against his. Lips mere inches apart.

"I hate you, Ben Solo," I manage to quip as I struggle to slow the racing of my heart.

"The feeling is mutual princess," he grinds out. His lips descend on my own roughly, I involuntarily moan into his mouth, and he swallows it down with a growl. The kiss is not sweet, it's a mix of tongues gliding against one another desperately, lips managing to keep up, and teeth clacking against each other every so often. He shifts his head to the side to get a better angle at kissing me. It makes the kiss deeper and I lose myself in the sensation.

Our lips part only so we can suck air in greedily, "That's it you little brat," he snarls, "Grind on my cock until you come." His jaw is clenched hard as he inhales deeply through his nose.

His words are so dirty and yet they don't turn me off whatsoever. They manage to make me whimper and I hate myself for it.

"B-Ben, don't say things like that," I declare feeling humiliated even as I grind on him unabashedly.

He laughs humorlessly, "Acting like a prude while you do this? Why am I not surprised."

"I really despise you."

"We've already covered that sweetheart. Now fucking come."

"No, just watch. The one who is going to come first will be you," I whisper against his lips. His face goes dark with barely constrained tolerance. Suddenly I'm flipped on my back his fingers tug at the button of my jeans. I wrap my hand around his wrist, but he's too strong as he yanks them open tugging the zipper down angrily.  My entire body arches when he shoves his hand into my panties over the curls, straight down my slit parting the folds, and dips his middle finger inside. It's thick, almost painful, but when his thumb begins circling my clit that I've only played with a couple times I moan so loud that I startle myself.

"Fucking hell Rey, you're so tight and wet. Damn it!" He curses pushing his finger in and out of me his thumb continuing its pace on the spot that is making me a quivering mess.

"Please Ben, s-stop!" My eyes snap shut as I throw my head back trying to breathe.

"Do you really want me to?" His ring finger begins to join the other and I feel like I'm being torn apart. His fingers are way too thick for their own good.

"It hurts, please stop," I whimper wanting the pain to ease.

His fingers leave me immediately. He moves off of me completely going down the hall to the bathroom shutting the door behind him.

My body is still shuddering violently. It had felt good until the other finger joined, then it became too much to handle. He didn't get mad and keep going…no he stopped right away…I had caught a glimpse of guilt before it passed being replaced by a stern look as he left to the bathroom. With trembling fingers, I buttoned and zipped my pants. Ben returned a moment later wearing his shirt and shoes adorned his feet.

"I'm going to go. Tell your parents I'm sorry and that I just wanted to go to sleep," he mutters leaving without another word or look my way.

That was an utter disaster.

* * *

 

Age 17

Ben

I've never been fond of the beach. The sand was always too hot and got stuck in places I couldn't even understand. Still, when my friends declare we go and they invite Rey to come along with her friends is how I wind up burning under the harsh rays of the sun-hating my existence. Poe, Hux, and Finn are having a field day as they play football.

 It doesn't surprise me when Poe starts getting a little too touchy-feely with Finn, but Finn seems to have no problem with that and touches him back. It came as a bit of a shock to learn that Poe was gay, but both Hux and I only want him to be happy. Phasma, the girl Hux is madly in love with, smiles at him seductively a promise in them that Hux eats up.

As for Rey and Rose, they are enjoying boogie boarding at the moment as I sit on my towel trying to stay out of the sun and water as best as I can.

Rey and I never did mention what we did on her parents' couch that hot summer day when we were fifteen. After that, we went back to being at each other's throats all the time. It was as if every-single-thing the other did we couldn't stand and had to bitch about it. We snarled and cussed, she even went so far to swipe me across the face with her nails, and I in return bit so hard into her neck that I'm sure I drew blood. She had howled in pain which ended up in us on the ground, her tugging hard on my hair, and me threatening to break her fingers if she didn't let go. It was a déjà vu moment as I remembered when we were seven the way her tiny fists hit me and managed to give me a bloody lip. I was ashamed to cry, but it had really fucking hurt.

We had both hated the idea of going to the beach together. Thankfully we were in different cars.

Rey emerged out of the water a wide smile on her delicate face. She's wringing her hair out, laughing at whatever Rose is animatedly telling her. Rey wears a one piece that has a tiger displayed upon it, my eyes betray me as I stare at the spot between her thighs remembering how warm and tight it had been. Her legs are long and slender smattered with freckles. She had grown a lot this past year, but I still towered over her. The suit has no padding in the chest area letting me see her tiny buds hardened by the chill of the water. Her tits are perfect, she's no more than an A-cup if I had smaller hands maybe they would fit just right in my palm, but I know they won't. My hand would cup her breast with ease. It sounds much hotter than some chick with fake tits.

Rey is beautiful just as she is. I growl at that thought for even coming to be. I hate her and that was that.

Rey comes up next to me bending over showing off her surprisingly curvy ass. It makes me want to bite into the flesh of one of those tight globes that are slightly lighter than her golden legs. My cock decides it also likes the idea, spurring to life making my board shorts much too tight. Running a hand through my hair with pent-up tension coursing through my veins. Standing much too suddenly to my feet catches the attention of both Rey and Rose. Rose gazes up at me as if she was a mere ant about to be squashed. Her eyes always lit up with fear when she looked at me so I wasn't surprised. Flicking my attention to Rey I notice that her eyes are staring straight at my cock straining to break free from its confinement.

Her eyes meet mine and it's the first time she has held the connection no trace of what she's thinking appears on her face. I lose my nerve, baring my teeth at her, and stomp off to the ocean, walking out until my feet can't reach the bottom floor which happens to be pretty far out. I dive under the waves that begin to increase in size making my heart pound. It's exhilarating while at the same time being extremely frightening. I ride the high of my adrenaline coursing through me forgetting all about Rey and her sexy one-piece.

Groaning inwardly that the thought is now in my head again. I ride a wave returning to the shore and hate the way the sand feels under my feet as I make my way to my towel.

Finn and Poe have joined Rey and Rose to lounge on their towels.

Hux and Phasma are nowhere to be found. I already know what they're doing and would rather not have that image in my head. Everyone looks over at me as I yank my towel off the ground running it along my arms, down my stomach, and over my legs.

"Damn Ben, I didn't realize you're actually pretty hot," Poe whistles causing heat to span over my entire body. I glare openly at him.

"Fuck off Poe."

"If you're interested you can join Finn and I some time," Poe teases earning a light slap on his chest from Finn who rolls his eyes at the comment. Rose laughs, but there's no reaction from Rey. Making eye contact with her proves to be detrimental to my health because her pupils are dilated, and she looks like she's going to attack me at any given second when my defenses are low. My Adam's apple bobs as I gulp and I know she's caught the movement.

"I'd rather not, but thanks for the offer," I mumble drying off my hair.

"You're no fun." He sticks his tongue out at me hugging Finn tighter to him.

Night falls upon us in no time. We are all still hanging out on the beach when Hux and Phasma show up finally a bottle in their hand.

"Let's drink," Hux declares raising a bottle of what looks to be tequila in the air.

"Where the hell have you been?" I asked crossing my arms over my chest.

"Getting this obviously," Hux says like I need to catch up already on the point.

Hux unscrews the cap taking a chug, his face stays neutral as he wipes his mouth off with the back of my hand giving the bottle to Phasma. She takes a shot but coughs and sputters. Hux chuckles patting her back. The bottle is thrust towards me, nervously I take it taking a whiff of the liquor instantly regretting it at the putrid smell. I grow some balls and throw the bottle back grimacing at the way it burns as it goes down my throat. I hiss in disgust as I hand the bottle to Poe.

It gets passed around multiple times, most of us are disgusted by the taste especially Rey, her eyes had widened and she told Hux it was disgusting. He responded by saying it wasn't supposed to be good. It had one job and that was to get us drunk. We were going to be stranded on a damn beach where we were illegally drinking and I panicked until Hux produced three room keys. That had made us all look at him in confusion.

"I got us fucking hotel rooms! Well, Phasma did because she's twenty-one," Hux sheepishly says. All eyes are on him now.

"Twenty-one?" Rose says with a thunder-struck expression.

Phasma speaks up, "I know how you must think of me, but the heart wants what it wants." She says with a shrug of her shoulders. "You guys have to act my age though because technically you guys aren't supposed to have your own rooms without my supervision."

Suddenly everything starts to click, there are three rooms, that means Hux and Phasma in one, Poe and Finn in another, and that leaves Rose, Rey, and I in the last one. What the flying fuck! I grab the bottle out of Hux's hand chugging a large amount of the shitty liquor and Hux cheers me on.

We all stumble to the hotel, the cars long forgotten at this point. We straighten up just before we walk in acting like we're not drunk off our asses. The hotel receptionist looks bored as she reads a book not even sparing us a glance as she chews nosily on her gum.

There is this weird tension in the elevator. Out of the corner of my eye I note that Hux and Phasma look about ready to pounce on each other, Poe is running his hands over Finn's chest, and then there's Rey who is talking to Rose totally oblivious to all that is going on. Everyone is blitzed. I know I am, but my anxiety is also making sure it's still in the loop. Even though I'm drunk I'm still rationalizing everything.

"You can have the bottle Ben," Hux slurs as he places the bottle in my hands as well a card that will get me into the room I'm staying in. He leans in, "When Rose is asleep make your move."

I bristle at the comment, "Fuck you, Hux. You know nothing."

He just grins at me, "Whatever Solo. I've known you for a long time now and I know how much you want her. You can say otherwise, but I know the truth."

He slips away passing Poe is card then disappears into a room with Phasma. Poe smiles at me then tugs Finn into the room, and I'm left with two girls as well as a bottle of tequila. I hand Rey the card, she doesn't make eye contact with me. I take a couple chugs and hand it to Rose who takes it willingly. Rey leads us into the room, an awkward silence falling over us all as we stare at the two queen-sized beds.

"I'll sleep on the floor," I say with no hesitation.

Both of their eyes whip to me, "What?" Rey says acting like she didn't hear me.

"I'll sleep on the floor."

"Thank you so much, Ben!" Rose hollers launching herself onto one bed snuggling her face into the pillow. It's crazy how she passes out within minutes of laying down. Rey snuffs a laugh down behind her hand as Rose snores softly. I barely realize that Rey is wearing only a summer dress over her bathing suit. The image of her walking out of the water is forever seared into my mind. Rey continues to stand against the wall staring at the bottle in my hands. Lifting my arm is the signal that she can have some if she'd like. Cautiously she walks over taking it from me and takes at least two full shots before she comes up for air.

"This stuff truly tastes like death," Rey huffed extending the bottle back to me. I was way too drunk already so I put the cap back on twisting it to ensure that it wouldn't spill everywhere.

"Can I have a pillow?" I slur more than ask.

Her eyelashes flutter as she looks up at me through hooded eyes, "You can just sleep in the bed with me," she says rather shyly.

"Rey, that's not a good idea."

"C'mon Ben, we both know what's going on between us. Do you truly hate me?"

"Yes," I snarl surprised by my outburst.

She steps closer, eyes narrowed, "Why do you think that?" Her voice is low as not to wake Rose.

"You make me feel things I don't want to feel. You drive me insane Rey."

"I drive you insane??"

Scowling at her, "Yes"

"You're a fool, Ben Solo," she hisses.

"And you're a fucking bitch."

She slaps me hard. I deserve it.

Still, my chest rises and falls as she glowers up at me. I don't hesitate in fisting her brown hair dragging her head back, her lips parting in surprise.

"What are you going to do huh?" She taunts lips curling into a rude smile.

I move so fast my brain whirls as I wrap my hand around her throat just enough to scare her, but not enough to cut off her airways. Hazel orbs gaze at me as she trembles.

"Don't test me, Rey."

My lips brush against hers, a whimper is all I hear when my tongue traces along the seam of her lips demanding entrance. Her lips respond in kind.

She pulls away, “I’m not supposed to like you Ben.”

“I was never supposed to like you either.”

We lean in…

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> XOXO <3
> 
> (Find me on tumblr <3)  
> [Down The Rabbit Hole](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/spikeisinspace)


	3. Is It Just You?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm very sorry this chapter is short and just pure smut! 
> 
> Thank you to all my readers you are all so amazing <3
> 
> I am actually taking requests. Send me a prompt idea and I will write a one-shot <3
> 
> Thank you once again! I seriously love all of you!!!
> 
> Much love :)

Rey

Age 18

Ben sits on the couch watching the movie that is playing with bored eyes. Our parents once again have insisted we hang out with one another even though we were both adults now. A week after the beach trip, he turned eighteen and I followed three weeks later. Thinking about the beach trip has me blushing. Rose woke up as we were leaning in to kiss each other. We had separated so quickly that it was obvious we had been up to no good. Rose was still too drunk so she didn't notice the shift. Still, both of us were too scared that she would eventually wake up. I slept on the bed and him on the floor.

Ever since then things have been awkward between us. I hate it. He acts like we didn't even share that kiss together. We had admitted to liking each other, but he's been giving me the cold shoulder. Even now when we're alone he refuses to acknowledge me. It's taking a lot out of me not to huff and puff like a child that can't get that shiny new toy they really don’t need.

My eyes dart over to him, his blank tank-top revealing bulging biceps that lead to forearms smattered with dark hair and veins that stand out against the hard muscle. His ebony locks tempt me to grab onto it and yank, make him feel just a morsel of the pain he's put me through this past month. He has always hated having his hair fucked with.

I don't think twice. Suddenly I'm on him yanking hard at his hair hearing him let out a surprised yelp before it hardens into pure fury.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" He snarls grasping onto my wrist so hard I feel like it is going to snap in half.

"I hate you!" I hiss tugging even harder. Ben manages to get his hair out of my death grip by using sheer force over me. My back lands hard on the carpet, but it doesn't detour me from lashing out. Kicking, scratching, and snapping my teeth in hopes they will sink into flesh. We're wrestling and Ben has the upper hand with the fact he is a wrestler and much larger than I am. I'm flipped onto my stomach, the side of my face pressed into the carpet his palm pressed to my cheek to hold me down. He grasps onto my hip yanking my body to where my ass is now arched in the air.

I feel something hard against my ass instantly realizing he's pressing his erection into me.

My body shivers at the touch, goosebumps erupt all over my skin.

"Why are you so upset Rey?" He asks hand circling around to splay out on my stomach inching up until it meets my bra and then without warning-pushes under grasping my breast. I gasp as his thumb begins to circle my bud.

"Stop," I weakly mutter enjoying the sensation of his thumb driving me mad with desire.

"Always telling me to stop, but I know you're wet for me Rey."

"Don't be so sure of yourself," I hiss knowing he's absolutely right, but hating him for acting so high and mighty.

"Have you wanted me to do this the entire month?" His palm slides away from my breast moving south now.

"No," I lie.

"I really do like fucking with you Rey. I was waiting for you to get angry. I'm glad it only took a month. I'm going to fuck you Rey and I know you're going to fucking love it."

"Cocky bastard!"

"You're the one who wore a dress _princess_."

My face heats in humiliation at him assuming I wore this for him. His weight vanishes, fingertips stroke my outer thighs as he begins to roll my dress up tantalizing revealing my ass to his eyes, and pushes it past my hips letting it go. All I can hear is his low grunt of approval, it takes me off guard when he grips one cheek in his hand squeezing roughly.  The other dips past my panties making me whimper. He finds me sopping wet for him.

"Soaked. As I expected," he growls. I moan when his tongue darts out to lick me off of them. The sight makes my core clench. His dark eyes meet mine, a smirk appears on his gorgeous face. He returns his hand to my wet folds, parting them so he can dip his finger inside. He gathers my slick spreading it over my clit to aid the tight circles of his thumb. Two fingers begin to sink into me, it hurts, and I wince in pain.

"It hurts." I jolt trying to escape the pain, but his other hand takes my hip in a vice grip.

"Gotta get you used to being stretched out little one or you're never going to be ready for my cock. It's going to tear you in two either way."

My walls flutter at the raunchy words he is spouting. He has such a dirty mouth that I can't seem to get enough of. He pushes his fingers all the way in the pain dulls as he slowly moves them in and out spreading his fingers out while they are inside me. Another finger begins to join the other two and now I know I can't handle this.

"It hurts way too much," I declare reaching back to clutch onto his thigh digging my nails in.

"My cock is bigger than my three fingers Rey, now take it like a good girl." He thrusts it inside. I cry out making a fist with my other hand so tightly my knuckles are going white, my nails cut into my palm.

His thumb continues its relentless circling, the stretch of his fingers giving way to a sensation I can't even describe. I'm spiraling towards climax then he suddenly pulls his fingers out leaving me empty. I whine, but the sound of a zipper shuts me up. Ben hunches over me licking a thin strip from the bottom of my spine up to my ribcage his fingers grab onto the waistband of my panties and tugs them over my ass down to my ankles. Ben grabs my elbow yanking me up on wobbly legs, directs me to the couch, and makes me get on it. My ass is once against arched up towards him my knees sticking to the old leather couch.

I'm gripping to the top of the it, peering over my shoulder I see Ben shove his pants and briefs down kicking them to the side. There's a condom between his fingertips, he tears it open with his teeth. His hands are trembling as he rolls the prophylactic over his shaft.

Ben's cock is thick and angry looking before he hides it from my sight. Once the protection is rolled on Ben reaches to the collar of his shirt hoisting it up and over his head tossing it without a care in the world as to where it ends up. His hand wraps around his cock and guides it to my wet opening.

Slowly he ebbs his way through the tight ring, the head of him inside already stretching me in a way that I did not feel with his fingers. The sting of him slapping my ass makes me start and I rear back causing him to sink deeper inside me. I cry out my nails dig into the couch and bite down on the inside of my cheek to contain more cries from escaping. Ben strokes my clit easing the pain somewhat, but another harsh whip of his hand on my ass is how I end up hunkering back so hard that my core engulfs his whole cock. Tears slip down my face unwillingly, a sob wracks my body as I try to adjust to being split in two. He wasn't lying about doing that. Not one bit.

"Fucking shit, I'm sorry Rey. I'm so sorry," his voice is strained as he tries not to move. My core keeps clenching over and over again on the foreign object only sufficing to make me feel every thick ridge and inch that is inside me. _So painful!_ I scream inside my head. Ben was massive in every way and now I was discovering how it felt to be stretched so much you just want to cave into yourself.

Ben reaches out to stroke my quivering bottom lip, his thumb slowly gliding along it. Dark brows furrow at my pained expression. His lips are upon mine a moment later, gentle as they move against mine. The tip of his tongue lightly traces my bottom lip, fingers continuing to teasingly stroke my clit, and I feel myself start to relax. He keeps me distracted by the slow, passionate glide of our tongues.

I feel _every_ inch as Ben painstakingly pulls out and shallowly thrusts in and out of me.

"Damn it, Rey. You feel way too good. Forgive me," he mutters as his hands grip the couch right next to my own. His massive upper body cages me in, I can feel the frantic racing of his heart against my shoulder-blades. He begins to rock his hips, using the couch to balance him and give him the momentum he needs. Low curses escape him as I feel him rear back, heart no longer pounding hard against my back. His fingers spread out along my lower back. As he pulls out he uses his hand to help rock me on and off of his cock.

"Oh god, Ben! Please, Please, Please," I whimper not really understanding why I'm begging.

"Ah, fuckkk! Rey, I-I'm sorry, I'm gonna come," he whimpers and the sound manages to sound so masculine that I begin to utter nonsense.

"Do it, Ben! Come for me! I want you to so bad! Fill me up with your cum!"

His breath hitches, one leg lifts up, his foot lands on the couch, and he's somehow hitting deeper inside me. His pace so brutal that the head of his cock is slamming against my cervix, his sac slapping against the back of my thighs making such a crude sound. Both hands are gripping my hips now, fingertips sinking into the flesh there as he pounds into me. I'm a sobbing mess due to how amazing it has begun to feel. A loud shout escapes him and I know he's reached his release, but he keeps thrusting his fingertips reach around attacking my clit in a way that sends me over the edge only moments later. He groans as my core tightens around his softening cock.

He pulls out flipping me onto my back, pulling the condom off and tying it before his lips smashed against mine. We lay there making out for what feels like hours.

His lips hover above mine, dark eyes run over my face, "I hate you, Rey," he murmurs. I only smile because I know exactly what he's truly saying at that moment.

"I hate you too Ben," I reply back earning a smile of my own. His lips are on mine again.

 

_The End._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> XOXO


	4. All Because of You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I did promise a sequel but hopefully, you are all cool with this cute little epilogue <3
> 
> Thank you to my amazing readers! I love all of you!!!
> 
> Much love <3

Ben

"Are you fucking kidding me, Rey? I planned this trip months ago! You're going whether you like it or not," I snap pushing my glasses further up the bridge of my nose. Scowling back at the papers in front of me.

Rey slams her palms down on the desk, my jaw clenches at her reaction, but I take a deep breath and look up at her. Her mouth is twisted into a frown, brows pulled together in frustration. We've been together for eight years now and still can't seem to agree on anything.

"C'mon Ben, Empire of the Sun only comes around once in a blue moon! Rose is going and she says she has an extra ticket that I can have if I want to go."

"Rey, we're going on a cruise that same week. You can't go."

Crossing her arms over her chest, she purses her bottom lip, "This isn't fair Ben! We can just reschedule the cruise!"

"You're acting like a child, enough," I snarl before returning to the court papers I need to look over to see if this person is even worth defending.

"I hate you, Ben Solo."

"Feelings mutual princess."

"You're a shitty boyfriend," she adds before stomping away. I'm on my feet so fast at that comment; wrapping my hand around her bicep I yank her towards the desk pushing her up against it.

"What did you just say you little brat?" My hand pushes in between her shoulder-blades forcing her chest to the desk.

"Go to hell," she hisses trying to escape my hold. It's pointless though, she knows she can't escape me even if she wanted to.

"I'm a shitty boyfriend huh? I'm the one who works my ass off so you can do what you love and not have to work. I'm the one who ensures that you have a roof over your head. I have been the one by your side through everything! I have done so much for you because I fucking love you, Rey! I hate to use this shit against you, but I can't stand it when you have the audacity to say such a fucking cruel thing to me. I planned this trip for us because I wanted to have a good time with you! You are such a fucking brat and I'm going to teach you a damn lesson."

My chest is rising and falling hard, Rey has gone speechless her cheek pressed against the desk as she eyes me warily. She stays stock still when I tear the button of her jeans open and shove her pants to her ankles. Her tight ass revealed to my gaze, lacy board shorts greet me. I slip my thumbs into the waistband making them join her pants before standing back to my full height behind her. My fingertips dance lazily along one globe and then I'm raising my hand back slamming it down on her ass. She yelps, clawing at the desk pushing papers off in her attempt to get away from me. I'm relentless as I whip her ass with my palm ignoring the sting that has begun to form there, gripping her hip so she can't escape.

"Ben! Please stop! Please! I'm sorry!" She cries out, tears slip down her cheeks a soft sob wracks her body, and I immediately stop.

"Fuck! You drive me fucking insane Rey!"

Her ass is so red, my palm obvious against her golden skin. I feel sick to my stomach. Without thinking twice I abandon my office storming upstairs to the master bedroom. Yanking my clothes off, my heart beats an unsteady rhythm. Walking into the bathroom I turn the water on not caring if it is warm or not I step inside. The water is cold as it lashes against my skin with its icy sting.

Dragging my palms over my face I feel the sudden urge to cry. A lump has begun to form in my throat. Things with Rey had always been toxic in a sense. Ever since we were kids we have battled and battled against one another. Still, I have always loved her. I loved her through the hard times and the good times. When she told me she wanted to be a writer I worked even harder at my job so she could stay at home and write to her hearts consent. I had done everything in my power to give her everything she wanted and still it doesn't feel like I have done enough. She would rather go see some band versus going on a cruise with me.

The thought claws at my heart and before I can stop it there are tears running down my face. I let out a growl slamming my palm on the tile hating the fact that she gets to me this much.

Turning the water off I step out drying off, wrapping the towel around my waist, and find Rey sitting on the edge of the bed. Her eyes snap to mine, she must see that around my eyes are rimmed with red because she's off the bed cautiously moving closer to me.

"Ben, I am so sorry. You have been planning this trip for so long and I wrote it off like it was nothing."

"Just forget it. I'll cancel it," I mutter pushing past her to pull on my briefs.

Her hands grab onto my waist startling me, "Please Ben, don't do that. I really am sorry."

I manage to get out of her hold, "I said forget it, Rey, for fuck's sake just listen to me for once in your damn life."

"I won't forget it!"

Turning to face her, I glowered down at her, "You are so stubborn."

She reaches up cupping the side of my neck trying to drag my face to hers, but I refuse. Her scowl deepens; she stands on her tiptoes, but only manages to kiss the edge of my jaw.

"You want me to fucking kiss you?" I taunt, lacing my fingers through her hair tugging her head back.

"Yes," she says through clenched teeth.

My lips draw close to her running teasingly over them, "Too bad," I whisper against them letting her go.

If looks could kill I'd be dead.

                                                                                                                                                     ∞

Rey refuses to talk to me as we board the cruise ship heading to our rooms pushing past other patrons that are also trying to find their room. She has hardly spoken to me since our fight, even going so far as to lock herself up in her office, and also slept on the couch even though I told her I would.

This was probably the worst fight we've ever had. Usually, we get over our arguments fairly quickly, yet, not this time around. I had tried to apologize, Rey just wasn't having it.

Even though our room isn't spacious, it still is big enough for us to move around comfortably. Rey sets her bag on the bed pulling a bathing suit out.

"I'm going to go to the pool," she says curtly and enters the bathroom. Growling to myself I begin to put my clothes in the provided dresser by the bed. When Rey exits the bathroom my knees almost give out on me. The bikini she wears hardly covers her ass and her tits are popping out.

"You are not going to the pool dressed like that." My voice is strained her hazel orbs narrow at me. She just raises her nose at me, pulling a dress over her head, grabs a book, and leaves the room without another word.

I feel like I am about to explode.

The little hellfire!

She knew that her being dressed like that would drive me up the wall and now she's going to the pool looking like that. She was going to be surrounded by a shit load of men that were most likely single and would think she was easy prey. The thought has me tearing my clothes off like a madman pulling on my trunks forgoing a shirt as I headed to the location of the pool. It was in the middle of the ship and my eyes immediately scanned quickly in search of Rey.

 I spotted where she was, my fists clenched when I saw a tall blonde man that looked like a complete scumbag talking to her. She was laughing at whatever he was saying. It was the first day on the ship, it had barely begun its descent from the dock, and the last thing I needed was to get kicked off the ship.

Steadying my breathing I decided to just ignore her and cool off instead. There was a couple of women in the pool chatting to one another. They seemed a bit older, tan skin, flawless nails, and all had bleach blonde hair. When I hopped in the pool all their eyes landed on me. My face stayed passive as I leaned against the edge of the pool.

All three of them smiled at me. I smiled back knowing Rey's mom would scold me for not having manners. She had embedded that into me.

When she found out about Rey and me she gave us both a knowing look stating that she had hoped that eventually, we would get together. Needless to say, our parents had set us up.

The three women drift closer to me, my brow quirks up at them.

"Hi there handsome," one of them purrs.

"Hello," I reply curtly.

"What are you doing all on your lonesome?" Another one asks a big diamond ring shines on her finger. She's married but probably likes to flirt with younger men to make herself feel like she isn't aging.

"Just cooling off. My room was a bit too hot for my tastes."

They giggle.

"I'm glad you've graced us with your presence." Their eyes roam over my body heatedly.

"You are cut to perfection," one exclaims.

"Thanks."

Suddenly a wave of water splashes on all of us, the blondes shriek, and I look over to see Rey her face alight with a fury I know all too well. A smirk crawls on my face slow and sure. She swims over to us, the blondes glower at her.

"You really had to cannonball right now?" One asks.

"Oh, I'm sorry I didn't see you there," she says in a falsely sweet tone.

Without a second's hesitation, Rey swims up to me, wrapping her lean legs around my waist, chest pressing up against mine. She places her hands on the sides of my neck leaning in to plant a kiss on my lips. The ladies scoff in displeasure most likely swimming away. I'm too busy tormenting Rey to deal with them anyways. Pulling away from her kiss she scowls at me trying to lean back in. I turn my face to the side giving her my cheek.

"Why are you doing this Ben? Are you getting off on how much I want you?"

"You didn't want to be on this trip in the first place so don't force yourself to act like you'd rather be here than anywhere else. I don't have to forgive you yet Rey and at the moment I really don't want to."

She unlatches from me, tears shimmer in her eyes, "Fuck you, Ben Solo."

Her sad eyes evoke my protective nature and I suddenly hate myself for this continued rejection towards her. Rey is already out of the pool storming off to our room and I jump out of the pool following close behind. She slams the door in my face, I do my best to tamp down my anger sliding my key into the door, and entering. Rey is about to shut the bathroom door on me but I use my massive body to stop her and push inside.

The bathroom is small, barely big enough for both of us to stand in and at the moment I have her pressed up into the sink. She's drilling daggers into me, pushing at my chest to make me back up. I don't budge.

"I know I've been being a dick to you, but I was fucking hurt that you didn't want to be here with me. You fuck me up, Rey. Ever since we were kids you have had this power over me that I still don't understand. All I do know is that for some damn reason I can't get enough of you. I love you. Please let me have you," I beg my hands itching to touch her skin. I know that we have been at each other's throats for good reason and that she has been being a stubborn little brat but lord knows I need her more than life itself.

"You don't fucking deserve to have me and you know it."

She pushes past me maneuvering back into the room. There's only one way I can make her give in.

I grab her hips startling her, spinning her around to face me I waste no time in slamming my lips against hers holding tight to her jaw. She pounds her fists on my chest trying to break the kiss.

"Please," I beg against them, "I need you."

"Then you shouldn't have been a dick!"

God damn it!

I laugh humorlessly undoing the drawstrings on my shorts, pushing them along with my briefs down to my ankles. Kicking them off I lay back on the bed wrapping my hand around the base of my cock. Tugging slightly I groan at the wave of pleasure that rushes through my entire body.

"What are you doing?" Rey shrieks pulling a dark chuckle out of me.

"You remember when we were kids, you caught me with that porn magazine, and we ended up dry humping on the cold ground? It had felt so fucking good. Even through the jeans, I could feel just how wet I was making you. I ended up with a wet spot on them and couldn't stop sniffing it while I jerked off to the thought of you riding my cock. Then there was that time on the couch where your little virgin cunt couldn't even handle one of my fingers. It was so damn hot, but eventually, you let me have you. Every time you let me inside that pretty cunt of yours I thank whatever god gave me you. My feisty girl."

Rey doesn't say anything while she undoes the bow on her top and shoves the bottoms off. She crawls over me, straddling my hips, taking my cock in her hand and wastes no time sinking down upon it. We moan in unison, her nails dig into my chest, and the slight sting brings a new wave of pleasure.

My hands slide up her golden thighs giving them a tender squeeze to signal for her to move. She lifts her hips all the way to the tip of my cock and slams them back down leaving us both breathless. Rey is gorgeous as she rocks her hips getting the hang of the rhythm she wants to set. She's so warm and tight clenching around me in a way that has me wanting to take control of the situation. I force myself to relax, guiding her hips so that she speeds up.

After all the teasing I can't take it anymore, I grab her elbows hauling her against my chest, planting my feet on the bed, and drive into her with a force that has her screaming my name. I know I'm hitting her deep, her walls flutter around my cock maddeningly. Holding her close I flip us over hunkering back on my heels dragging her hips up so that now her feet are planted on the bed. Her eyes roll to the back of her head as I slam into her.

Her moans are timed to every thrust into her. She chants my name writhing beneath me as her hips rock forward to meet mine. I need her lips against mine dropping her hips my hands bracket her head, diving in I steal a kiss as I continue to roll my hips slowing my pace drastically. She moans helplessly into my mouth, our tongues become entwined I grab the back of her neck growling into the kiss.

Pulling out to the tip, I torture us both by sliding inch by inch till I'm seated fully inside of her again only to repeat the slow motion.

"Please Ben faster," she begs against my lips.

With an urgency that surprises me I pull out twisting her onto her stomach, she lies completely flat, and my mind decides I'm going to try this position. I spread her tight globes reveling in the low moan that escapes her. Pressing the blunt head against the tight ring of her other hole. Gasping she jolts wiggling her ass slightly.

"I want to take this hole baby, would you let me do that?"

She nervously shifts underneath me, "It's going to hurt."

"I know. If you don't want me to I won't," I murmur letting go of one globe to grasp onto her jaw angling her face towards me.

"Will you make it feel good?" She asks hazel orbs dilating with lust.

I smirk before pressing my lips gently against hers, "You know I will."

"Then, yes, I want you to," she breathily says.

"Fuck Rey, you're fucking heaven-sent," I growl thrusting my tongue into her mouth loving the way she whimpers.

From her lips I place kisses down the side of her neck, nipping at the skin of her lower back, and kissing the golden skin of her perfect ass. Spreading her cheeks once again I lick a strip from her clit up to the tight ring that I've never had the pleasure of being inside, yet.

"Oh god," she gasps when I circle it with no shame whatsoever. Pulling back, I spit on her tight hole using it to lubricate her, replacing it with my tongue only a moment later. She grasps onto the sheets of the bed, moaning with abandon as my tongue circles over and over again before thrusting inside. I can't believe I'm fucking doing this. I've never thought I'd be the guy to eat her out here but Rey drives me to do things I've never done before. She has always been the one to keep me on my toes.

We had done plenty of kinky shit from bondage to role-play but this was taking the cake. Not once in the past eight years have I ever asked if I could do anal with her. Whenever other people mentioned it she would cringe and that was my answer to not ever go there with her. Now, here I was thrusting my tongue in and out of a hole that had never been taken before. We had lost our virginities together and now I was about to take her last virgin hole. I knew I was one lucky son of a bitch so I was going to make sure that this felt as amazing for her as it would feel for me.

Retracting my tongue I circled the ring with my finger and began to sink it inside feeling her clutching at it, "Relax, I don't want to hurt you," I murmured pressing a kiss to one tight globe.

She breathed hard, digging her forehead into the pillow while she did her best to relax under my ministrations. I sunk the finger all the way in and gently began to push it in and out to get her used to the feeling. The second finger made her cry out in what sounded like pain. I halted my movements immediately.

"I'm sorry babe, do you want to stop?"

"Please, just put your cock in," she whimpered lithe body quivering.

I pulled out of her turning her on her back crawling back up her body, with my clean hand I cupped her jaw making her look at me, "I would never keep doing something to you if you can't handle it. I love you, Rey. I just want to make you feel good."

Her eyes softened, tears fell from the corner of them, I wiped them away, "I love you so much, Ben. I'm so sorry I'm good for nothing. I act like everything you do for me is nothing. You do so much for me. You work so hard to ensure I have a happy life and here I am just a failing writer with nothing to offer. I'm worthless."

My heart ached at her self-deprecation, "Don't you dare fucking say that you are worthless. I do everything I do because I love you and I believe in you. My world revolves around you. You are the sun and I am constantly chasing you. You have given so much to me that I could have never dreamed of. If someone told me that you and I would be together one day I would have laughed because you were always too good for me. You are my life, Rey. So, please never say you are worthless because you are anything but that."

Her arms wrapped around my neck pulling me close, her breath warm by my ear, "Thank you, Ben."

"I'd do anything for you," I mumble into her neck pressing a kiss there.

"Then put your cock in my ass," she replied with more confidence than before.

I smirked into her skin, pushing up on my palms to stare down at her, quirking a brow at her, "Are you sure?"

"I've never been surer." Her eyes are kind and I lose myself in them for a moment. She seriously is all I need.

I lower my hand to where she is still wet using it to slick up her other entrance, my lips crashing against hers in a desperate tango. She moaned causing me to get hungrier with every push and pull of our tongues. My arm encircled her waist arching her off the bed slipping my finger inside the tight ring feeling her finally give in. Her fingers ran through my hair clutching handfuls of it, hips bucking down to get the finger inside of her deeper. I sunk another in and groaned when she tugged hard at my hair but didn't push me away.

"I need you," she whimpered and tugged at my lower lip with her teeth.

Pulling my fingers out I adjust her so the back of her thighs rested on top of mine. She looks like a goddess splayed out in front of me my free hand runs along the soft expanse of her stomach, and up to her breast kneading the tender flesh.

"So beautiful."

She whimpers at the sentiment, returning my focus to the spot I'm dying to be inside of I spit on my hand coating my cock before nudging the tight entrance with the tip. I begin to push in, breaching past the compact ring of muscles that are trying to keep me out. I'm panting so hard especially when finally I'm able to sink just the head in. She is doing her best to remain still underneath me, her eyes are scrunched together, and her brows are knitted together. She's like a board causing her inner muscles to flex making her that much tighter and I know that has to be causing her significant pain.

"You have to relax, baby, just breathe."

She breathes deeply in and out allowing me to slide deeper. I hang my head low; to the point, my chin is touching my chest while I try to keep a level head so I don't end up hurting her. Still, I know this must not feel that great with the way her walls are stretching to accommodate me. Pulling apart to spread around my thick cock and she is biting her lip so hard she's drawing blood. Deciding to not prolong this slow descent I grip her hips and push all of me inside.

Rey cries out slamming her head back against the pillow, "It hurts, oh god, it hurts," she whimpers shaking her head.  Her bottom lip wobbles and her whole body is shuddering. My thumb starts to circle her clit and her breath hitches. I stay stock still and give her this pleasure in the hopes it will relax her. Soon enough her hips are moving almost dislodging me but I keep her balanced holding tight to her waist.

"Move," she breathes and I obey without another word.

I begin to rock in and out of her in a maddening rhythm that has me so close to the edge already. She is so fucking tight and it's making me lose my mind. Rey bucks beneath me causing me to go deeper each and every time. I grind into her getting a long moan from her. My pubic hair is rubbing against her clit so I angle myself to ensure she gets off before me. My hips rotate, thrusting harder and harder.

"You feel so good!" Rey screams and I groan in reply gripping her waist so tight I'm sure it will leave bruises.

I'm rocking into her with purpose; her body is quivering the telltale sign that she is about to climax. I keep my rhythm not wanting to fuck her orgasm up by changing speed out of nowhere. When she comes I'm sure she sees stars, all her muscles clench, and I can't take it anymore. I force her to wrap her legs around my hips, I grasp her jaw with both hands and kiss her like it was the last time I would do so. My tongue thrusts inside as my cock slams deep filling her up with my spend. I don't stop kissing her, tongues and lips moving in time with each other. Her fingers are deep in my hair pulling me closer. It is moments later when I finally pull out and help her clean up.

Once we are clothed I find the reason why I planned this cruise in the first place. While she applies make-up in the mirror I bend to one knee behind her and open the tiny box. Rey sees me go to one knee behind her, turning around to stare down at me, and the ring that shines back.

"I guess it's not the best time to ask especially after sex but I don't want to waste a moment more. Rey, I love you, and I want to be with you forever. Will you marry me?"

Her eyes go wide and she squeals in delight, "Yes! A million times yes!"

I slip the ring on her finger and lift her into my arms both of us laughing. I press my lips to hers, "I love you, Rey."

"I love you too," she whispers.

∞

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> XOXO <3


End file.
